Sample Launch Teardown

What's working. Keep it.

The short description. "Flip sneakers from a Chicago block all the way to billionaires. Haggle with parody stars like Kan Yay and Elon Tusk, catch fakes by the stitching, and turn a $300 shoebox into a billion." It has a start and an end ($300 to a billion), a joke you can repeat, and the word free. Don't touch it.

The first line of the long description. "Nobody on this block says their number. Ever." That's the whole game in eight words.

Where it leaks, fixes in order

Fix 1 · biggest

The page sells two different games.

The first 1,800 characters of the description are a haggling roguelite: bosses, fakes, angles that stack. After "Hit a billion" it turns into a finance simulator: a Fed on a Taylor rule, the Treasury curve, repo spikes, a DCF, convertibles, SOFR. The description runs about 4,500 characters. Someone who clicked for "haggle with Kan Yay" scrolls into bond bookbuilding and leaves.

Do this: keep the haggle loop on top. Cut the finance part to one short block with a header like "and then it gets ridiculous" and three lines. Let the depth be the surprise people tell their friends about, not the pitch.

Fix 2

The first screenshot only makes sense after you've played.

Screenshot one is the end-of-run recap newspaper ("From three hundred dollars up to $3.40M"). A stranger can't read it yet. Screenshot two is the actual game: a seller asks "How much?", you drag a price bar to $860, the screen shows your edge. That one image explains the only verb in the game.

Do this: swap them. Haggle screen first.

Fix 3

The joke people would share isn't in the pictures.

Kan Yay, Elon Tusk and the Sheikh are named in the text, but none of the first four screenshots shows a boss. The parody names are what makes someone send the page to a friend.

Do this: put a boss haggle in the top three screenshots, and use the same shot for every social post before launch.

Fix 4

"Free" shows up once, at the very end.

Free is the strongest reason to wishlist a game you've never heard of. It's the last two words of the short description and doesn't appear in the long one.

Do this: say it again in the first lines of the long description: free on October 20, wishlist and Steam emails you the day it's out.

10 conversations to join this week

Real threads, picked for this game. Two rules for every one: say one specific true thing about the game, and add the link only where the host asked for links.

#WishlistWednesday, Oct 14: @TheIndieManiac. Last week's had 152 replies (last week). Post the haggle screenshot, not the logo.
#WishlistWednesday, Oct 14: @igdmag. 146 replies last week (last week).
#WishlistWednesday, Oct 14: @gelius__. 140 replies last week (last week).
#WishlistWednesday, Oct 14: @sensational965. Host says he wishlists what's posted (last week).
#WishlistWednesday, Oct 14: @indieDevC. Same, 71 replies last week (last week).
#WishlistWednesday, Oct 14: @GameTikker. 67 replies last week (last week).
#ScreenshotSaturday, Oct 17: @Giulio6686. He replies to every screenshot with one thing he likes, 130 replies last week (last week). Use the boss shot.
#ScreenshotSaturday, Oct 17: @TheIndieManiac. 170 replies last week (last week).
Sneaker crowd talking about games: @Sneakernyame. "Old days, do you remember this game?" got 790 likes (thread). Sneakerheads who play games are the exact audience. Join with a memory, not a link.
A player asking for multiplier-heavy roguelites "like balatro or cloverpit" (thread). O'BLOCK's angles stack the same way (one ordered set pays x12). Answer the question honestly; mention the game only if it fits what they asked.

3 posts, ready to use

nobody on this block says their number. ever. o'block: flip a $300 shoebox into a billion by haggling with kan yay and elon tusk. free on steam october 20

elon tusk's number moves after every offer. kan yay's tells are all backwards. the sheikh says nothing at all. 12 bosses, one verb: name a price. free on steam oct 20

fakes give themselves away in a font, a smell, a slumped toe. one tell is nothing. two is a fake. too late, you bought them. now go find somebody who reads worse than you. (attach the haggle screenshot)

Each one works with the link removed. Put the Steam link in a reply under the post, not in the post.

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